Vaudevillain

Chapter 77: Upgrades, People. Upgrades!

The first thing Dr. Zlo needed for his heist was minions. Sure, he had Mabel, Cass, and Quartet, but the others were his friend's minions. Plus, he needed Jacques. He wasn't about to have anything else do menial labor.

"Mabel!" Dr. Zlo cried out. "I need you to get Quartet and meet with me!"

The creation of the new Lackey Factories presented a new opportunity for the Jacques. No longer would Dr. Zlo worry about the witless minions dumbly breaking their objective and attacking random law enforcement. Instead, his new models would feature a bright red bow tie acting as a second brain for the Jacques.

Dylan giggled as he walked back over to the factories. The upgrade idea was perfect for the character, reminding him of the rangers villains he watched as a kid. A big, shiny button that screamed "weak point!" was the perfect upgrade. The increased effectiveness would be a nice touch. Maybe now a Jacques would use a gun correctly.

When he reached the factories, Dr. Zlo went to work sketching his new minion idea, making sure to emphasize the comical bow tie. The little notepad he took back in Haven City filled up with inky drawings as Dr. Zlo flourished his pen on the paper. Once finished, the villain gave the sketch a quick once over to catch any mistakes then fed it into the scanner. The factory hummed to life as the scanner finished, the computer listing the materials needed for the creation.

Jacques 2.0

Domino Mask (1)

Red Bow Tie (1)

Smartphone (1)

Molding Plastic (12 kg)

Silk Thread (3 spools)

Not bad for an upgrade, and Dr. Zlo didn't have to worry about finding the money to buy the materials. He decided to make twenty of the new Jacques.

The cost of materials removed around five thousand dollars in total, the molding plastic's price was higher than expected. Dylan resolved to find a way around the exorbitant price in the future; maybe he'd steal an entire plastic factory or something. But for now, the dip in cash wasn't as important.

With items in his inventory, Dr. Zlo went to work feeding them into the various funnels in the Lackey Factory. The shower-shaped machinery went to work. Spray nozzles and mechanical arms whirred around the transparent box as smoke filled the area. A bit later, the machine dinged, and a masked Jacques walked out, bright red bow tie sitting prominently under the collar.

Seeing Dr. Zlo, the minion saluted and walked over. Dylan smiled; already, the minion showed improvement. "Wait here until the others finish," Dr. Zlo commanded.

The Jacques nodded, standing at attention while it watched the factory output another of its kind. The new Jacques saluted as it walked out to stand next to the other. Dr. Zlo turned away to find Mabel and the others; he'd expected them to arrive any second now. Behind him, a third Jacques walked out of the factory and saluted. The first Jacques saluted back, then the new Jacques turned and saluted to the second. It followed suit.

Dr. Zlo found Mabel sitting at one of the various tables away from the city buildings, taking tea with Quartet on the edge of the platforms. "There you are!" Dr. Zlo shouted. "Come, we have work to do. Dextra has informed me that there is a stash of Phlebotinium in the city of Mutatholis. We're going to steal it."

"Alright, hon," Mabel replied. "Just let me get my things."

"Hurry it up. I'll be over at my new factories in the center of Skyline."

With that, Dr. Zlo stomped back to the factories. Cass followed behind, a martini at the ready in case his boss got thirsty. A smoky hand yanked the glass off the silver tray Cass used, and the butler frowned as he saw Shizuka take another drink. As he stared, Shizuka pointed to something in front of the butler. Cass turned, only to find himself crashing into the back of his boss.

"Cass!"

"Sorry, boss."

Dr. Zlo grumbled, "Lucky for me that you didn't have a drink on that tray. It would take hours to remove the stains."

The villain turned back to stare at what made him stop in the first place. Half of his new Jacques had finished, and they all stood in a line saluting each other one at a time. But that wasn't the craziest part. No, it seemed like his Jacques were smarter, but still inclined to perform their unique brand of insanity.

The Jacques had established a pecking order of some kind, based on some unknown factor in the salutes. When a new Jacques saluted, each would respond in kind. Once the whole row finished, the Jacques would rearrange themselves, leaving a hole open for the new Jacques. Sometimes, the new minion would try and contest, only to get ganged up on by the others.

"I'll never understand why my creations act like that," Dr. Zlo muttered.

Mabel and Quartet joined up a while later, after the last of the Jacques finished. "Perfect timing!" Dr. Zlo said. "I've almost finished here."

"I do wonder, hon," Mabel started. "With all these new boys, how are we all getting down to this new city?"

"By using the flying machines, of course!" Dr. Zlo exclaimed.

"Hon, you only made two of those, and both are getting used."

Dr. Zlo brought up a finger, only to have it droop and fall under his chin, "Hmm, what would make a good flying vehicle for one as great as I?"

"What about a flying car?" Shizuka said, popping up in a blast of smoke.

"Gah!" Cass exclaimed. The Jacques behind all threw up their hands in surprise.

"It seems a tad tacky," Dr. Zlo said. "Besides, I don't want people to associate me with that crackpot scientist who invented whistling candies."

"Um, sure," Shizuka replied. She puffed away in a blast of smoke and appeared leaning next to Cass. "How about a teleporter?"

"Yes, that could work. We'll need to inform Dextra, of course."

"I gotcha covered." Shizuka made a few complicated hand signs. Dr. Zlo blinked, and suddenly two ninjas stood in front of him. The real Shizuka smirked and slapped her clone on the back, "Go inform Dexxy that we should look into a teleporter room."

The clone nodded and jumped away toward the building where Dextra sat working.

"Now, how about we figure out how to get down to Mutatholis."

Dr. Zlo held up a hand, "Hold on, we?"

"Of course, I'm coming with you. Do you think I'm going to miss this?" Shizuka gestured at Cass and the Jacques. "This is some of the best comedy I've seen in a while. I need front row seats."

"Fine, but you'll have to match the theme I'm going for," Dr. Zlo answered.

"Lay it on me, baby."

"First, let's make our way down to the city."

After a bit of discussion, the two players landed on creating a series of parachutes for the whole team. Someone else could pick them up with one of the shuttles when they needed to return. Or Dr. Zlo could create another flying car; either option worked. At least, parachutes were the option until Dr. Zlo saw their base price.

"Eight thousand dollars for one parachute? That's highway robbery! I refuse to pay for something like that."

"Oh, don't be difficult, I'll spend the money if you really can't afford it," Shizuka said.

"We have twenty-five people. I hardly think I'm being difficult."

"Well fine. Let's message someone with a shuttle and wait for them to return."

"Yes, let's."

Dr. Zlo sat down at one of the scattered tables in a huff. Inwardly, Dylan was thinking about the type of transportation he would need. There was so much about the character he hadn't thought about. So while Shizuka messaged the group chat, Dylan thought about Dr. Zlo's car.

The idea of the character was perfect. The top hat, cane, and suit combo leaned directly into the over-the-top old-timey villains Dylan wanted to play. The grandstanding and megalomania fit as well, and his minions matched the image he wanted. Still, Dr. Zlo needed to round out the rest of his theme.

The image of a car came to mind, the type used in period dramas set in England. Yes, something like an old Rolls Royce could work. It looked classy enough for Dr. Zlo, but at the same time, the black paint job and boxy frame helped give a villainous air. Inspired, Dylan took out the notepad and started to write down ideas.

The car wouldn't fly, that would be far too tacky for Dr. Zlo, but a return teleporter could bring him back up to Skyline. Getting down wouldn't be an issue as long as Dylan made the teleporter large enough for cars. And the vehicle would need some strong armor, something like a forcefield and a bulletproof frame. Finally, round it out with a series of gadgets meant to stall any pursuer, and Dr. Zlo had his new Zlomobile!

He finished up the last of his notes when Shizuka popped into his vision. "C'mon," she said, "Ram and the others are back, we can file in with them to get down to Mutatholis."

"Excellent! Soon the city will worship my greatness!" Dr. Zlo cackled as he ordered his minions to follow. It was time to cause some more chaos.

The two villains made their way over to the shuttles, a strange fusion between an airplane and a bus. It was something Dr. Zlo created on the fly, and so no defenses lay hidden inside the machine. Luckily, no one had caught on that the flying shuttles led to Skyline, but it was only a matter of time. Good thing they had a plan to install a teleporter.

The Jacques filed into the vehicle, cramming into the back like sardines. Quartet and Mabel followed, both choosing to sit on opposite sides. Cass tried to sit next to Dr. Zlo but got pulled away by Shizuka. Instead, Rampart made his way over.

"So, what's the plan?"

"Your interrogation won't break me, hero." Dr. Zlo shot back.

"Oh no, you've discovered my master plan to interfere in a heist that benefits both of us," Rampart deadpanned. "How ever did you uncover my plot."

"Oh come on, Ram," Oro said, sliding into the seat next to the two, "you know he wouldn't explain the plan if you ask him outright, he's in character."

"I'm just giving him a hard time," Rampart joked.

"Ha, I see you're trying out reverse psychology now that the direct approach isn't working. It still won't work," Dr. Zlo replied.

Oro smirked, "Oh, I know exactly how to get you to talk."

"I doubt it," Dr. Zlo challenged.

Still smirking, Oro pulled out a bit of rope from his inventory. "Ram, I need to borrow your hands."

"What?" replied the hero. But before he could respond, Oro wrapped the rope around Rampart and tied him up.

"How dare you capture us, evil villain!" Oro started. He wrapped the rest of the rope around his arms, "You'll never get away with this!"

"Of course I will! My plan is foolproof!" Dr. Zlo started. "By disguising my minions as a marching band, I will infiltrate the mutant school! Once there, my minions will capture the head of the school, where I will ransom him for all of their Phlebotinium! Muahahaha!"

"Told ya I could do it," Oro said to Rampart as he untied the ropes.

"Ah! Curse you! How did you know I would gloat when you were tied up?"

"Let's just say it's my little secret," Oro laughed.

The three players joked around as the shuttle descended into Mutatholis, Shizuka joining a few times to poke fun at Dr. Zlo. Dylan laughed along with the rest, enjoying the time with his new friends.

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