Vaudevillain

Merla eyed the four figures surrounding her, doing her best to keep as many of them in focus as she could. The heroine still had her shield up, but as soon as she cast another spell, it would fall, leaving her wide open. The four cloaked figures crouched low and grabbed the hems of their hoods. All four removed their outer garment in one fluid motion to reveal a series of players in steampunk garb.

"I do say," one of the villains said, a man dressed in a patchwork suit. "We seem to have pinned two rather formidable heroes."

On the villain's head stood a top hat, decorated with winding copper and bronze. A pair of goggles rested on the razor-sharp rim of the hat, and Merla was starting to realize these player's themes. She solidified the thought when the man grabbed a thin cane with wires coiling around it.

"Indubitably, professor," another answered, a woman dressed in a flowing dress. "I was so sure Bubble would take them out in one shot. She's oh so destructive, after all."

This woman had the signature steampunk look woven throughout her dress. Instead of frills and lace, the outfit threaded wires and flashing lights throughout. A pipe jutted out of the woman's back, emitting slow puffs of steam. Merla took stock of it and added it as a possible weapon.

"It isn't my fault I can't control the output," the woman Merla assumed was Bubble answered. She was dressed in military garb one would find in a historical museum or a reenactment of a war. A copper-red coatee interwoven with gold sat atop her petite shoulders. A stiff cap covered Bubble's dirty brown hair cut close to her scalp. "But, I'm sure Overlord Zlo could discover the secrets behind this."

"Don't blame the lass, Victoria," the final villain said. "I remember it wasn't long ago that you came to me for help with your little problem."

This last man stood slightly hunched, and a dirty white lab coat draped over his shoulders like a loose scarf. Underneath the jacket whirred and clicked several mechanical devices, all hissing quietly with steam. A pair of dark goggles covered the man's eyes, and Merla got the impression he was surveying the area as he talked.

Her suspicion proved correct when Hardlight created a cage of energy around the villain and made to escape.

"All of you talk too much," Hardlight said as he rocketed off. At the same time, the hero squeezed his energy cage. Yellow energy closed around the scientist, but the villain looked unfazed.

The scientist pulled out a contraption that looked like an amateur's attempt at a chemistry set rolled into a gun. Bubbling liquids of all colors sloshed around the glass containers. The villain aimed it at Hardlight and pulled the trigger. A blast of rainbow-colored smoke spiraled out of the weapon in a beeline at the hero. Hardlight made another motion with his hand and brought up a shield of light. The smoke crashed against it and spilled over the edges. Hardlight jerked back on his energy disk to escape.

Merla took the chance to act, creating a smokescreen with her magic. At the same time, Bubble activated her power on her companion's rainbow smoke. The cloud formed into a sphere, then popped, accelerating the attack's momentum and catching Hardlight off guard.

"What the–" the hero yelled, but as he inhaled the smoke, his body seized up.

Unbalanced and unable to move, Hardlight fell to the ground headfirst. He landed with a crash on the sidewalk concrete, his neck bending at a strange angle. Victoria winced slightly as he landed but stayed composed.

"Sad to see he didn't think things through," the scientist villain said. "He should have reacted as we were talking instead of waiting. Don't you think, miss hero?"

Merla didn't respond. She was making her way toward the side alley she'd spotted before the attack. The heroine hadn't expected an ambush to come so quickly, considering how quickly things devolved into a fight in the beginning. One of these players was smart and most likely had an excellent power to complement it. She wouldn't chance fighting four people. It would be better to regroup with other heroes and head to the harbor.

"She's not going to answer someone as uncivilized as you, Chemster," Victoria sniffed. "Not with your dreadful attire."

"No fighting, you two," the man in the top hat said. "Remember, we're here to prove ourselves to Overlord Zlo and get his attention."

Victoria rolled their eyes. "The very thought of me fighting with him sends chills through my spine."

"What's the next order, Professor?" Bubble said.

"What else? We continue to follow Zlo's good companion, Riptide. I believe he's making his way to an aquarium at the moment."

Merla paused. That was important information. She steeled her resolve and prepared to cast her spell. It was all the more imperative that she escape now.

"Oh, Chemster," the Professor said. "Could you do something about this dreadful smoke? I can't see a thing, and we can't have the last hero escaping now, can we?"

Merla booked it for the alleyway, her hands going through symbols to recreate her flight spell. Behind her, Chemster pulled out a box covered in glass tubing. The villain pressed a button on its side and set the box on the ground. A rapid whirring came from the box, and a small cyclone of air appeared to suck in the surrounding smoke. The glass tubes running throughout the box turned grey as the contraption pulled the smokescreen inside.

"Much better," the Professor said as the smoke cleared. "Secondhand smoke is a dreadful thing, you know."

"Professor, she's getting away!" Bubble pointed up to Merla, who had activated her flying spell and was soaring into the sky.

"Unfortunate," the villain said. "But no matter. We've stopped this group from chasing Overlord Zlo's companion. What say we meet up with the cad at the aquarium?"

"Oh, let's!" Victoria said. "I've always wanted to see the exotic animals in the oceans."

"Understood, sir," Bubble answered.

"Lead the way, Professor," Chemster said.

"Victoria, if you would do the honors?"

"Certainly, Professor."

Victoria curtsied low, the steam pipe near her back unfolding from her body to reveal a series of tubes and gears. Before the villain's eyes, Victoria's lower body furled outward, connecting new gears and pipes to form the frame of a car. Wheels inflated and appeared on the edges of the frame, and a steering wheel constructed itself in front of the villain. Once the process finished, Victoria directed everyone to take a seat in the newly created 1920's car.

"Let us be off!" the Professor said as he stowed his cane inside.

Victoria grabbed the steering wheel and rammed a hidden foot on the gas pedal. The car rocketed forward without a care for anyone else in the way as it rushed to the aquarium.

Riptide arrived at the aquarium with Jaws and G.W. behind. The two shark's mouths were salivating at the chance to taste the animals inside. However, neither would rush forward without Riptide's command. A smattering of cars sat in the parking lot outside, and a few families walked in and out.

"Looks like the perfect time to mess with people, dudes!" Riptide exclaimed.

"Don't take too long," G.W. said, but its heart wasn't in it. The allure of tasty fish was breaking its resolve.

"No problem, dudes," Riptide answered. "I'll make sure this won't take long."

With that, Riptide dove towards the parking lot with his surfboard, cheering all the way. NPCs under him looked up at the falling villain and screamed. They knew what happened when a laughing villain appeared. Parents gripped their children and ran for cover, while aquarium employees rushed to activate the hero hotline. Riptide ignored all of it, blasting the doors open with his laser and making a beeline for the exhibits.

Jaws and G.W. followed behind, growling at anyone brave enough to try and make a stand. Those who weren't intimidated met the unpleasant end of Jaw's fist, and a few were sent flying into the air by G.W.

"You won't get away with this!" a mother cried.

"What are you going to do about it?" G.W. sneered.

"T-the heroes will stop you!"

"The heroes!" G.W. laughed. "Look around! There's no heroes here to save you. Instead of calling for them, you should be begging for life at my feet."

The Great White kicked up a gust of air, tossing the woman to her knees in front of him.

"Go on," G.W. said, leaning down to expose his maw of teeth. "Beg. For. Your. Life."

The woman whimpered as rows of teeth glinted under the aquarium lights. Her whimpers turned to heavy sobs as G.W. loomed above her, taunting her.

A small fist hit the minion's tailored pant leg.

"Don't bully mom!" a small child yelled.

"What's this?" G.W. said as he looked down. The small kid, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt with an octopus on it, was throwing its tiny fists against the minion's leg in the vain hope that he could stop it.

"Oh, so cute." G.W. smiled. The woman paled.

"No! Please! I'll do anything!" she pleaded.

"Too little, too late," G.W. said. He reached down to grab the child.

A blur of orange rushed past G.W., and suddenly the kid was no longer in front of the shark man.

"Boy, you've got an ugly mug," a young voice said. "Does your mother need to put a paper bag over your head to kiss you goodnight?"

"Who dares!" G.W. roared.

The orange blur appeared again, and the shark minion found himself on the ground with an aching jaw. Confused, G.W. shot to his feet and whirled in place, looking for any sign of what attacked him.

"Wow. Ugly and tough. You're like, the most stereotypical street thug," the voice quipped again.

"Show yourself, coward!" G.W. roared.

"Now, that's not nice at all," the voice said. The orange blur appeared again, forming a ring around G.W. and then stopping in front.

A teenager stood in front of the large minion. An orange jumpsuit covered the man's body, and a visor covered his face.

"A puny kid?" G.W. said quizzically. Then, the minion barked a laugh. "Go home before you hurt yourself."

"Wow, ageist much?" the hero replied. "Looks like your mother didn't teach you manners either."

"I ate my mother," G.W. snarled, his maw of teeth glinting.

"Okay, that's just gross," the orange hero said.

While G.W. and the hero bantered, Jaws snuck up behind the orange hero. Muscles rippled across the minion's grey skin as he wound up for a punch.

"Look out, Lightspeed!" the kid from before cried.

The hero known as Lightspeed became a blur of orange light, dodging Jaw's strike completely and countering with his own uppercut. Jaws hit the floor before his brain realized he missed.

"I tell you. Villains don't have any manners," Lightspeed quipped.

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