203 You must think the worst of me
“Please tell me I didn’t do anything stupid last night,” her pleading eyes were directed at the Commander.
“If sleeping with me is what you call stupid, first of all, that hurt,” Azriel smiled. “And second of all, you think the worst of me because I wouldn’t take advantage of you in such a vulnerable position.”
“Why are you… without clothes?”
“I am only without a shirt because this is how I usually sleep.”
She quickly began to button her dress. “And this?”
“You were sweating. The gown was too tight around the neck.”
“Then what am I doing on your bed, my Lord? Because I have no idea how I got here.”
“You don’t remember because you passed out”, Azriel said. He sighed and got off the bed. Penelope looked everywhere but him and his bare chest, and Azriel almost laughed out loud.
“I don’t remember passing out,” she said.
.....
“Pen,” Azriel called. She trained her gaze to somewhere above his head. “Your body was begging for nutrients while you overworked it more than it could bear. Is this still about Neera?”
“I avoid thinking by occupying my hands with tasks, my Lord,” Penelope said. “And with the death of the Queen, well, you said you cannot take me to see my friend.”
“Not yet,” Azriel corrected. “Not with everyone in the Kingdom coming down here.”
“Neera would need me.”
“She’s got Zavian.”
Penelope looked at him then, a frown marring her forehead.
“Exactly why she needs me even more.”
“He loves her more than anything, Pen, even if you think otherwise,” Azriel said. “Zavian did nothing but save her life.”
“How?” Penelope shot at him. “How exactly did he do that? Convincing her to become a demon?”
“Jasmine killed Neera”, Azriel fit in the piece of the puzzle that had her perturbed for days. Penelope’s brows squished together, and she blinked rapidly.
“What?”
Azriel sighed. He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes tightly. With a shake of his head, he continued speaking.
“Neera died, Pen. Zavian brought her back to life.”
“What?” Pen asked, bewildered.
“Jasmine had two maids carry out the murder.”
“No,” Penelope shook her head. “No, you are lying. You are trying to protect your friend. I want to see Neera now and have her tell me the truth!”
“Take my word for it because it’s nothing but the truth,” Azriel gritted out.
Penelope ran both her hands through her hair, gathering her black hair into a rough bun and working to button her gown. Azriel knew she was heading to the castle, so he was quick to lock the door of his chambers.
“No!” Penelope slapped her palms on the door and pulled at the door handle. “No, please! I will be back, I promise. I just need to see her now. I am going crazy!”
Azriel held her by her forearms, and Penelope lost her balance as he whirled her and she fell back on the bed.
“Listen to me now,” Azriel’s voice took a low growl, almost predatory. “I have had enough of this. My words are nothing but the truth, and you have no right to question the King or speak ill of his intentions. I let it go because you are angry, but do not forget he is the King, and I am your Master, is that understood?”
Penelope’s breath caught. She spread her fingers out in a fan against her mouth, her hair undone and splayed over her face. Her breaths burst in and out between her fingers, and under the brightness of the candles, Azriel could see the hints of the paleness of her skin from the day before returned.
Azriel sat on the bed, grimacing at losing his temper. They both didn’t say anything for a while, and he didn’t miss the quiet sobs from Penelope.
“Pen, come here”, he called to her softly.
She didn’t move to him, so he pulled her into his arms, and rested her back against his bare chest. He slid his hands up and down her arm, and a shiver ran through Pen. The gesture worked in transitioning her sobs into silent sniffles.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to raise my voice at you like that,” Azriel said in her hair. “I lost my temper there.”
“Please let me go”, Penelope begged, and quickly, she added, “my Lord.”
“I didn’t want to scare you, Pen,” Azriel said. “I am wound tight. You are wound tight. Everything that’s happening…”, he sighed, and hugged her even closer. “Give Neera some time. That’s what Zavian is doing, and that’s what you should do. She is the same person you met with everyone.”
“Even the King?”
“Yes, even him.”
“But why the Queen?” Penelope asked. “Neera talked a lot about her when I go to visit. I thought they were close.”
“They were, but maybe Neera and we all also thought so. Sometimes, not everything is as it seems.”
Penelope ruminated over his words for a while. “But if Neera is back, what made her the way she is?”
“We don’t know, Pen,” Azriel smoothed back her hair. “We don’t. As I said, I only wanted to hide it from you to protect you from the truth.”
“No, please don’t do that anymore. I can handle it. At least now I know the reasons. It was unbelievable, yes, and I am sorry for not believing you,” Penelope turned to look at Azriel, and he held in a breath. “But I was going insane. I was forming about a hundred different stories in my head when there was only one. Thank you, for telling me.”
But as she stared at Azriel, she could feel the racing pulse, or maybe it was hers. One move was all she needed to shift away from him and regain her senses, but she was frozen in the spot.
Azriel traced the edge of her jaw with his knuckles. Pen closed her eyes as the sensation licked through her.
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