Hearing my answer, Chii appeared troubled. She reflexively bit her lips and lowered her head as though she was admitting her guilt.
As someone who cares a lot about her, seeing her like this was enough to elicit a reaction from me. I didn’t think twice to quickly wrap my arms around her in a bid to ease whatever was on her mind. And along with that, I followed up on my earlier statement.
“I’m not trying to rush you on your decision. I apologize if my answer came off sounding like that.” I caressed her hair and back while the girl remained silent. “Alright. Correct me if I’m wrong since this is how I interpreted your question; you’re asking why I’m not as intimate with you, right? Let me reiterate my answer…”
I paused for a moment to wait if ever she’s going to correct me. When the only reaction she did was to slightly raise her head to meet my gaze, I took it as her affirmation.
I lifted her chin to keep her eyes on me before continuing.
“Actually, it’s simple. In a normal sense, you and I are not in an official relationship yet. We can argue that we’re not normal but still… that stands true. Furthermore, even if you already accepted me, I won’t make a move on you or take our intimacy a step higher without regard as if I’m a disgusting pervert waiting to claim your body. I can’t deny that I’m a pervert though. Uh… that’s not the issue, is it?”
I intentionally acted a little goofy there. To lessen the heavy serious mood.
Chii and the girls around us all stifled a laugh upon hearing it. Satsuki and Nami even left a commentary,
‘There goes his tongue again.’
‘Indeed. He’s using his greatest weapon again, isn’t he? Ruu is this sly.’
… As expected of the two.
I scratched my cheek and coughed once to recover before continuing. This time, I almost twisted my neck by checking on them one by one. We’re in the middle, after all. Nonetheless, my next words were directed to all of them.
“I treasure all of you, this I will never deny. Unless I notice or you openly tell me that you’re willing to take that step after careful consideration, I will not ask you for it. Kissing you, embracing you as close as possible is enough for us to convey our feelings to each other. Doing the more daring and intimate acts can be considered an extension of it. Through doing that, it’s more of reinforcing and conveying our feelings in the most intimate way possible. Nonetheless, even without that, I will continue loving you just the same.”
That’s how it is… really. Besides, copulating is a human’s primal instinct. In the end, we will be engulfed with our desire for each other as well as another desire to please each other.
“You see… You and Satsuki experienced how forceful I was before the change in my mindset; Nami and Hina also experienced that although not as much. And because of that, as much as possible, I don’t want to be as forceful again. In other words, there’s no rush, Chii. We’ll definitely reach that point when the time comes.”
Ending my words to that, Chii who never broke her gaze with me wordlessly cupped my face between her palms. After blinking once to which her eyes shone with her stalwart conviction, the girl pulled my head down, initiating a long kiss.
Through that kiss, Chii successfully conveyed the difficult words she probably had no courage to say yet.
And obviously, it’s what she thinks of me. There’s no doubt that I am special to her. But her feet were still firmly grounded to reality as well as that fear of the past.
She experienced being neglected by me after all. When I got both Hifumi and Hana, the times where I went to look for her to fill my desire lessened considerably. She had to create the opportunity by herself. Add to that how I said being with her is boring, it’s firmly rooted in her mind.
Reconnecting with me and seeing my change lessened it. However, being aware that I have a lot of other girls besides herself, that fear awoke once more.
And today, what happened in this room further strengthened it.
It’s not an inferiority complex like what Saki was exhibiting at times but Chii probably started thinking that I might once again set her aside.
And through this kiss, she’s also trying to pull an answer out of me.
Furthermore, words wouldn’t be enough to settle her mind. What she wanted to see is what I am going to do next.
Around us, Hina and Saki already settled down on their seats. Even though they still appeared a bit red from what we did, the two looked on guiltily in our direction.
In fact, Hina tried to stand up and perhaps say something in regards to what happened but I signaled for her to stop. It’s not their fault that Chii became like this after all.
A few seconds later, the observer Nami probably noticed the state of Chii’s mind. And after a confirming nod from me, she stood up and went towards the other four, whispering something to them.
After doing that, the five stood up to clean the table we used before going out of the room. To not let Chii think that they would be leaving the room for us and feel guilty about it, I pushed her head down to my chest and let the girls pass behind her.
“We’ll be in the other room. We’re going to change there and return here.”
That’s what I read from Nami’s lips before she followed them out and shut the door.
… I guess I have to thank that girl later and also, make it up for Aya and Satsuki.
I waited for a minute after their departure before making my next move. I tightened my arms around her and lifted her off the ground.
With that sudden move from me, Chii had no choice but to hold onto my shoulder as she raised her head to look around.
Upon noticing that we were alone in the room, she appeared confused so the first thing I did was to clear that confusion.
I told her that they were going to change for PE. Of course, there are still at least twenty minutes before it so she argued that it was still early as she began to suspect that they left because of her.
“No, Chii. They don’t leave because of you. It’s because of me. Nami figured out that you’re waiting for what I’m going to do next. Here. Let me show you.”
“E-eh?!”
Chii blurted that out at the same time as I lifted her further. Because of that, she had no choice but to cross her arms behind me and wrap her legs to my back.
Confused, she asked what I’m going to do but I just told her to hold onto me tightly as I began to move from our position. My destination? The door.
“Let’s see. What about walking out of this room and… show the whole school how close we are?”
As I said that, Chii instantly panicked as she began wriggling out of my hold. Unfortunately, my strength overpowered her.
“Oi Are you crazy, Kii?! Won’t this ruin everything you built up?! D-don’t!”
Ignoring her protests, I continued on my steps. In less than a few seconds, we arrived at our destination. Chii angrily stared at me and leaned back on the door, her expression was as though she was a gatekeeper who wouldn’t allow me passage to the treasure room.
Which was funny because her legs were still wrapped around me and I’m supporting her back.
“Alright. I’m just kidding when I said that. Ease up, Chii…” I trailed my voice and reached in to kiss her. The girl accepted it albeit a little incensed because of what I did. A few seconds later I took the last few steps to the door, pushing her whole back against it.
“You see. I’m thinking about this a lot, Chii. About what I can do about your fear. Unfortunately, I concluded that… I’m powerless against it. No matter what I say, it will persist as it is something that has been rooted in your heart since the day that I cut you off.”
Upon hearing that, Chii’s eyes widened and she tried opening her mouth to refute it. But in the end, the words that left her mouth were an agreement to it. It’s about herself. She knew more about it than me.
“Cheer up. This is the solution I came up with… It’s probably lame-sounding but hear me out… Chii, hold onto that fear. And whenever it’s surfacing. Call me, come to me or grab ahold of me. Instead of trying to remove it. Let’s face it together…”
“Kii… I’m sorry but it’s hella lame.” Chii chortled as her gyaru side unexpectedly resurfaced.
But with that kind of reaction, the air cleared up.
“Right?”
I wryly smiled while Chii eventually burst out in laughter.
A while later, with her eyes regaining their bright color, she stared at me with her most beautiful smile plastered on her lips. “It’s too simple! Too simple yet… it’s the thing I really want to hear from you the most… Let’s face it together… You’re the one who planted that fear on me. It’s totally your responsibility to pull it out of me.”
“Mhm… That’s what I’m going to do… That’s why Chii… I’m not perfect. I’m a pervert and as you can see, you won’t be my only one. This isn’t the greatest confession and most likely, no one confessed in this kind of position or situation. However, can you let me steal you again? This time, I will not let you return to the normal side of society.”
Upon hearing that, another peal of laughter rang out. It’s cringe and Chii was having a fit because of it.
“Kii… That’s the lamest confession. You’re racking up your lame points… Uh… How am I supposed to answer?”
“Simple. Say ‘yes, steal me again’”
“Ugh. No… This will be my answer…”
Chii quickly rejected my suggestion. And in the next moment, she removed her ponytail and let her hair crumble down to her shoulder. And following that, she pulled out a handkerchief to scrub her face clean of makeup.
Since one handkerchief wasn’t enough, she also asked for my handkerchief while letting me hold onto hers. Obviously, it’s stained with her makeup.
A few seconds later, Chii handed me my handkerchief and by then… her bare face, devoid of any makeup, filled my eyes.
“Kii… How is this? I’m back to the Chii in your memory. I’m yours again. Please take care of me.”
With her too familiar smile, voice and face that matched up in my memory, I was too stunned to even utter a response.
No… My mind was filled with an odd question… “Why do I remember her as a plain girl when she’s in fact this beautiful?”
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