My Wife Came From A Thousand Years Ago

Chapter 56: So terrible

Xu Qing shot up from the couch, sniffing his own arm. It was unclear what exactly he smelled.

“May I ask, Lady Knight, what do you mean by that?”

“The smell.”

“The smell?” Xu Qing was momentarily confused, then it dawned on him. It must have rubbed off on him from that sleazebag Wang Zijun’s car.

“No, no, I don’t go to those kinds of places. I’m a law-abiding citizen. I don’t do anything illegal.”

“You don’t go?”

“I don’t go. I’m afraid of getting caught. If my old man had to bail me out, he’d have that brass-tipped belt ready again.”

Xu Qing, still reeking of alcohol, slowly lay back down, half-closing his eyes and reaching out to rub Winter Melon a few more times. The cat, disgusted by his smell, twisted away and jumped off.

“Those places are filthy anyway. What’s the point? I’d rather stay home and watch a movie… Ugh, I’m not going there. What are you even thinking?”

“Oh.”

Jiang He seemed to relax a little. “Actually… going to a brothel is pretty normal. A young scholar like you, with so much knowledge, would probably be very popular.”

“Me? A young scholar? Knowledgeable?” Xu Qing almost burst out laughing. “Go on, keep flattering me.”

“…”

“Handsome and talented, with unmatched charm and wit…” Seeing Jiang He go silent, he shamelessly leaned back on the couch and continued praising himself. “A dashing gentleman like me gets caught visiting a brothel, clothes all in disarray, crouching down and covering my head. If Haozi caught me, it’d be even funnier. That’s what you call social death. You’re terrible.”

“I… How am I terrible?” Jiang He was confused by his ramblings.

“You’re encouraging me to go to a brothel.”

“I’m not encouraging you. I just said… it’s normal. You don’t have to sneak around.”

“I’m not sneaking around!”

Xu Qing covered his forehead with one hand. “And it’s not normal. It’s illegal. Do I look like I don’t have enough run-ins with the police?”

“Illegal? The police would catch you?” Jiang He was taken aback.

“Yeah, it’s illegal. There are no brothels anymore. Prostitution isn’t allowed. So you don’t have to worry about me selling you off if I run out of money.”

“…”

Jiang He’s understanding of this world was once again challenged. There were so many rules.

“That’s why I said the outside world is dangerous. You never know what might be illegal. Like sneaking around on walls at night, carrying a sword, resisting arrest, or dining and dashing… There are too many things.”

Xu Qing squinted at the lights, shook his head groggily, and turned to her. “Good thing you met me.”

If she hadn’t met him, Jiang He might have ended up in all kinds of situations—maybe meeting some wealthy trust-fund kid, or worse, running into trouble.

A roof over her head, food to eat, and a stable life—by current standards, this was the best-case scenario.

“You’re a good person.”

“No, I’m not a good person.”

“You are.”

“I’m not.”

“…”

“Say I’m a good person again, and I’ll make you my servant girl to teach you how cruel the world is!”

Xu Qing got up from the couch, speaking fiercely, then headed to the kitchen to find the meal Jiang He had saved for him.

Having someone leave you food—it felt great.

Even if he wasn’t hungry, he had to eat some. What if she stopped saving food for him next time?

“I’m not going to be a servant girl!” Jiang He shouted after him.

“Then stop calling me a good person. I hate that word.” Xu Qing came out with a bowl of food. “Same goes for ‘benefactor.’ I don’t like that either, or I’ll…”

He paused, suddenly remembering he probably couldn’t win a fight against her, and just lowered his head, eating in frustration.

“Are those brothels, gambling dens, and shady places all illegal?”

“Yeah, they’re not allowed to exist. People might run them in secret, but if they get caught, they’re arrested, criticized, or even jailed.”

Xu Qing glanced at her. “That includes selling yourself, slavery, all of it… Selling yourself to bury your parents, like in your time, doesn’t happen here.”

“Why?” Jiang He’s little head was filled with confusion. “If someone has no other choice, and both parties agree…”

“Even if both parties agree, it’s still not allowed. It’s for your protection, and for ordinary people like me.”

“What does it have to do with me?” Jiang He’s face turned red. “I’m not selling… selling… I wouldn’t do that!”

“If you ever do, give me a heads-up.”

Xu Qing laughed, took a couple of bites, then looked up and thought. “You know elephants, right? Their tusks are really valuable. People love them, but selling them is banned. Even if you find one, you can’t sell it. Know why?”

“No. What does this have to do with me?” Jiang He muttered, still upset. “I’m not going to hunt elephants for money.”

If it was a choice between selling herself and hunting elephants, she’d probably try catching elephants.

“Because when people can’t find enough dead elephants, they start killing live ones. As long as people want it, someone will secretly hunt elephants, kill them, and sell the tusks as if they were found naturally.”

“And then?”

“That’s human nature. You think selling something you ‘found’ is consensual, but others who can’t find any will start making dead elephants to sell. Elephants are the weak ones, and we ordinary people are weak, too.”

“The freedom of the strong is the hell of the weak. Rules are necessary, or the strong will find endless ways to make you ‘willingly’ enter brothels, become slaves, or sell your organs—kidneys, lungs, liver. The rich have everything. They just pay money, and countless poachers will turn you into legal goods.”

Jiang He’s eyes widened, her lips trembling. “Selling… kidneys? And lungs?”

“Terrifying, right?” Xu Qing raised his eyebrows.

“How could people… do such wicked things?”

“It’s not that bad. There are cases of people having their kidneys stolen, or being tricked into selling one… But it’s better than no restrictions. Be grateful.”

Xu Qing took another bite, savoring his food. “In your time, people ate children for longevity, and nobody did anything about it. Now that was wicked.”

“I… I’ve never heard of that.”

“Well, you can look it up. It happened hundreds, thousands of years ago. Isn’t there Baidu?” He chuckled at her scared expression. “So remember, don’t drink water from strangers, don’t eat their food, and always stay alert.”

He used to think laws were excessive, getting mad when his videos were censored. But in retrospect, he understood—human nature couldn’t be trusted. Without rules, platforms would be overrun with chaos, even forcing professionals to join in.

Humans, huh.

“That’s terrifying…”

Jiang He, now searching Baidu, gasped and looked at Xu Qing with lingering fear.

Thank goodness he hadn’t sold her heart and liver yet.

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