My Servant Is An Elf Knight From Another World

The crowd was crowdy.

The food was foody.

And the music was… music-y. 

Being frank, there are little ways I could go about to accurately encapsulate the experience it was being the constant focus of the limelight. There were just so many things being thrown my way, like a lime pie of activities to the face over and over again… and each one had a thicker layer of cream, keeping me from ever seeing straight.

One moment I could be seated around a round table with a good few dozen starstruck gazes huddled close to me, breaths all bated, clinging onto my every word as I recounted my captivating tale from total zero to absolute zero.

Then the next I was stuck in another seemingly endless cycle of photo ops - guys would have me doing cool poses right next to them, while the girls would mostly insist on wrapping their hands around my arm, satisfied to go with just a simple smile - the single-file line, I swear, must have extended all the way out of the building itself.

That's not to mention the other things to like some guy designating me a pseudo-judge to his one-two punch style, or coming across an admirer that actually went out of his way to retrieve my jester cap that fell off in the race - peer pressure and overeager encouragement insisted I put on the mantle once more - and so to cut a long story short, I spent the rest of my time being known as the Hero Jester of Astra, striking fear in the hearts of his enemies… and when you hear his bells tinkling, it was already far too late.

Overwhelming as this sudden overflow of people vying for my attention was, I really didn't consider it much of a bother. They were real friendly, some even came up to apologize for talking behind my back at one point - overall, it was a great time all around - but something was missing, and inadvertently stumbled a random staff member walking his usual routine route, I couldn't help but tap a finger on her shoulder, and voice my concerns aloud -

"Where are the princesses, and where are the hosts?" 

To that, she was more than happy to redirect me and my inquiries to Tyler, guiding me to an empty seat beside him among a crowded table brimming with his own set of fans and admirers… and of course, slipped tight into a strap, his left hand was holding firm onto a small camera pointed squarely at him.

Then onto me, as he took notice of me.

"Ey, Big Man! Welcome, welcome!" He forcefully pulled me to him, practically bashing heads, as he swung his arm over my shoulder, speaking directly to the lenses as he did. "Leadeners, remember him? Sure you do! You cheeky bastards keep tweeting at me to head back to his crib - it's the Big Man, man! Big Man say hi! Do the Leadener greeting, c'mon. Thumb to thumb, ring finger to ring finger - there you go! Yeah! Awesome!"

Weird gang sign, to be honest. My pinkie fingers hurt now flexing those joints. But whatever, I've done more painful ordeals to please the masses, this ain't no thing.

"In case you weren't watching the number one live stream right now, let me be the first to inform you that you are now in the holy terrifying presence of a literal fuckin' God. Now I ain't spoilin' shit, you wanna know what he did, I say go find out yourself! But just know, ya'll trolls in the comments making fun of him on the last vid, he can literally fuck your shit up to upsidedown town so pray to your God that this God doesn't find you. Am I right or am I right, folks?!"

The table then erupted with the deafening cheers of affirmation, glasses raised highs and drinks spilling low, before it was all downed in one big swig in unison.

Someone handed me a cup too, I passed on that… then taking advantage of the window of silence, finally asked, "Tyler, listen… you've any idea where Ash or Amanda are at? Can't seem to find them anywhere."

Tyler shifted upright, laughing loudly as he did. "Ah man, I'm actually hearing this. What's up, Big man, can't wait a moment longer to get your hands on your prizes? Settle down, down there, dude… there'll be plenty of time for getting your frisky on later. Hell, I damn well believe you deserve that at least."

"How about just wanting to talk to them? Can I have that time now?" 

"Sure, 'talk', sure…" He wiggled his brows, widened his stare. "How do I know you won't be using your mouths for other things, eh?"

I slump my head, bells tinkling light. "Do you know where they are, Tyler?"

"Of course, duh! I'm a host too! It's my job to know!" 

"So where are they?"

"Preparing," He replied, tapping the rims of his glass for another pour. "In the belltower there, with the other hosts. They said something about, uh… core… coronay… corona? Coronation! Yeah! That's it. It's tradition, one of the rewards too. You're getting a knighting ceremony, and a little - like - memorial thing where they'll place something iconic from you on a little display alongside the previous Heroes from previous years, yeah."

A knighting ceremony plus a keepsake in my name? On top of the already hectic festivities currently ongoing too? Wow, when they go all out, they go all out, alright. I can see why the participant list was so chock-full of names.

"Then why aren't you with them?" I asked.

Tyler gave another hearty chuckle, one he swallowed down with a sip of his recently replenished glass. "Because I'm doing my job! Parties are my forte! They know it. I know it. Who better to oversee this whole thing here than me, right?"

Well, can't argue with that logic. 

"So when does the coronation begin?" 

"Soon, Big Man, soon," He reassured, patting me lightly on the shoulder. "Listen, you gotta chill. I know they're your girls, but have some fun alone first, yeah? Anyway, I wanted to talk to you, anyway. I just wanna say you did me proud back there… like, real, real proud." 

"You and everyone else, it seems," I said, glancing briefly at all the many pairs of eyes idolizing every inch of me. 

"But me more than anyone else," He lowered the camera, placing the both of us well out of the frame completely. "You talk the talk and walk the walk. I am so happy to see that what you said to me back in my car wasn't just total horseshit. Amanda, Ash… you really do love those girls to the moon and back. They're a lucky pair to have you." 

Tyler's smile at me was earnest, sincere… so much so, I couldn't help but return one back.

"I consider myself luckier to have them, and it's not just them either… some others too."

Noticing only just then, a little bit of envy making that smile just a tab bit more lonely.

"Ah, right, there's that other pretty girl you got too," He nodded. "What's-her-name, Adalia? Where's that girl actually? I reckon she would have made a babelicious princess too. That goth air, man… shit's unmatched." 

Not that he's mentioned it, I've no clue either. Along with Sera, I haven't seen them since the start of this whole thing, and now that it was ending, I thought I'd get to see them by now… apparently not.

Well, I'm sure I'll find them. I always do.

"Y'know, sometimes, I wish I got what you got," Tyler continued to mutter away. "When I go back to my hometown in a few days, it'll sure be nice if it ain't only my voice I hear echoing in my house walls."

It was my turn to assure him, my turn to pat. "Soon, Tyler, soon."

"Sure hope so, Big Man, I sure do," He heaved, then went back again to his usual cheery air. "So where's her? I'd love to see her again."

"Not a big fan of attention, like I mentioned," I said, sifting my eyes through the crowd. "She's here… somewhere. Dark alley, maybe. I'll have a look around."

"Look around later, she'll be fine!" Tyler said, pushing me back down when I tried to stand. "Have a drink! This moment's all about you! Enjoy it! You certainly fuckin deserve it after - huh? Yeah, yeah, what's up?" 

A tap on the shoulder, an unintelligible mutter near his ear, the staff member that approached him seemed to have brought some news that wasn't at all pleasing to the ears.

Tyler gave a begrudging sigh, immediately up on his feet, holstering his camera, sparing only a fleeting glance at me and an explanation just as brief, "Listen, duty calls. Some guy's starting shit somewhere, and security's busy with other things… so I gotta go sort that shit out." 

"Oh," I began to rise again. "Then I guess I'll also - "

"No, no, no, no!" He pushed me back down, staring down at me sharply. "When I say you enjoy yourself, you enjoy yourself! Have a drink first with these fine folks here." 

And so despite my constant insistence otherwise, when Tyler went away, I ended up staying put in place with both hands laid atop the table, an empty glass to my side, and questions in the dozens popping up left and right.

Did my best to answer them all. Trivial questions, weird questions, questions about which princess I honestly thought was prettier - the usual mindless fun.

Welp, if Tyler was right about one thing, it was that I needed a drink, alright. All this talking was making me thirsty. 

Then as if being summoned solely by my very thoughts, someone came strolling nearby with a full pitcher in hand. It took only the slightest raise of the hand to attract the guy's attention, and it wasn't long before he was heading my way.

Closer and closer.

Halfway close, that's when I noticed it - how this server's hands were unusually large, how his lengthy strides were also very much so. More than halfway, his footsteps began to clatter my glass… and that's when I finally realized it.

He drew up to my side, bowed slightly, and offered to me that same pitcher held out with those same enormous hands. 

Then in a low, hoarse, unmistakable voice, Nick asked me politely with the most rigid smile possible.

""Would you like a drink?" and with just a little extra touch of spite. "Sir?"

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