My Servant Is An Elf Knight From Another World

In all my life, I never would have imagined that an infinite white abyss could ever give off such a calming soothing feel to the soul. It could be a serious contender with a warm hug from Mom, or a snug blanket wrapped around you on a chilly day.

Here, it was as if every worry I had was simply just another section of white in this world of white. I got up to my feet, keeping away the disorientating feeling from pushing me off-balance from the utter lack of any spatial awareness.

Ria-Zero was absolutely nowhere to be seen - and yet, the exact moment that thought came into mind - suddenly, as I turned my eyes to an area already scoured, there she was… as if she had always been there all along.

Was she though?

Lying on the floor, rocking her feet side to side, her forefinger twisting and tuning, fiddling with a lock of smoldering hair. She was humming too. It was a familiar tune, a dainty tune… pretty sure it was the same one I heard her hum before.

I walked up to her, stood over her, and greeted her with a smile. 

She continued to hum in return.

"That's a nice sound," I said, settling myself down beside her. "Not exactly from the prettiest voice, but I wouldn't mind it lullaby-ing me."

"Aww," She gushed all lovey-dovey like, sitting upright with both hands to her chest, flashing puppy eyes so overt. "You're so… insultingly sweet, I'm touched. I should kiss you right now, right?"

"Aim for the lips."

"Oop - sorry, been there done that, not a fan. You suck with kisses."

I gave her a dull blink. "I was dying."

"And so was I," She retorted, furrowing her brow. "Don't make excuses. I gave it my all, and you gave me a mouthful of blood, so - sorry, this lips shan't touch yours no longer so long as I still draw breath."

See this? You hear this? This is what you call levity. Why the hell don't I get no more when I'm awake? Up there… I get handed a death sentence at least on an average of twice a day now, and I'm afraid that average just continues to rise.

"So…" Ria scooted closer, cocking her head. "How was your trip down memory lane? Anything caught your fancy in there?"

Sadly we can't be all lax and easy all the time. Sooner or later, duty calls.

"If anything, I wish there was a bit more to be caught," I replied. "I kinda got left on a cliffhanger."

She raised guiltless hands up high. "Nothing to do with me, you woke up…  you cliffhanger-d yourself."

"Then we shouldn't waste any time, let's go pull me up that cliff."

"Not so fast, give it some thought," She eyed me sideways. "You sure you wanna continue where you left off? Is that really the route you want to take through my past?"

Took a second to respond, did what she said, and gave it some thought, but ultimately all I had to say was, "The most logical choice, right?"

"Also known as the most tedious too, right?"

Answering a normal question with a rhetorical question. As expected of the flaming bird, her tongue's made out of smarminess, I swear...

"We go in order, you'll be here forever," She continued. "No reason you have to know every single little thing about me. It's better we stick to the highlight reel - cut out the filler, and go straight into the highest highs and lowest lows."

"Alright, fine… if that's how you wanna do it, then you do the explaining yourself, then," I said.

"Pardon?"

"Torem. Who the hell is Torem, Ria?" I asked… then shortly after, asked some more. "Just what are you supposed to be? Who's Silas? Where did your kids come from? Why were you all alone?"

There was a look on her face - not surprise, not unsettled, it took me a while to put a name on it, but then she smirked… and I realized she gets amused by the weirdest things.

"You and Irene been talking much?"

"I'm not the only one lost apparently," I said. "Seems you've been telling her a totally different past."

"Different?" She said, sniggering lightly. "Or maybe I just showed you one part, and I told her another part. No reason that they can't both be true now, right?"

"Yeah, Irene figured as much. Raised by one father figure, and adopted by another."

Silas? A father figure?" Her smirk very nearly faded. "I'm also going to presume she didn't tell you everything now, did she?"

Well, no," I admitted. "Honestly, for the majority of the time, we were mostly discussing more about our…"

Ria, the ever astute being of sharpness, noticed how I so surreptitiously trailed away at the end there, and raised both her chin and eyes up at me… waiting so very diligently for the moment I finish what I was about to say.

And after a moment or two later, her patience was well rewarded - I blew a heavy breath, "Our pact with each other."

"A pact…" She nodded once, twice, then just for the hell of it, nodded again. "A pact, a pact… wowie - there's a pact."

So busy looking at her smile widening with every second that I went blind to the happenings elsewhere. Only noticed my mistake when all a sudden I was staring mere inches away from her face, and my shirt collar was reduced to just a ball of fabric tugged by an iron grip. Her grip.

The last I've seen her flames burn like the sun was when she fought with the Matriarchs. It was the first time I've ever seen them that bright. 

I think there's a new first time now for that…

"Been in this pact long?" She asked casually, her face barely even visible through the glare of her hair. "A day? Two days? Three?"

"Weeks," I said at once, squirting so much that all I could see were smudges in a slit. "Two weeks to be precise."

She burned even brighter. "And you're only telling me this now - why?"

"I… didn't think it was relevant?" 

"You didn't think it was relevant…" She repeated back, only slower, only more menacing. "So, uh, do you still think that now, hmm, pact-man?"

I don't think I've ever shaken my head as fervently as I did before.

"And why's that, I wonder?" She asked, inching closer.

"Because one - I feel like any second you're about to turn me into a well-done serving," I hurriedly spoke. "And two - now I need your help with it."

"Hah, I bet!" She got nose to nose now. Personal space is a myth. You clearly deserve what's coming if you really thought you could hide this from me."

Wasn't even hiding, I was going to mention it eventually - it just never came up! Why am I taking the fall for something out of my control?!

"Now," Ria said at once, blinking so hard tiny embers spewed out from her eyelashes. "You are not going to get a word out of me nor a single memory again until you explain in great non-omitted detail how this predicament ever came to be in the first place."

Her flames dimmed back down to its usual luminosity, and no longer was the world just one blurry line covered in bright orange. 

"From the beginning?" I asked, leaning back in case she gets any funny ideas with my shirt collar again.

"You don't start a book midway through, do you?" 

"But that'll take forever."

"I don't care."

"We'll be wasting time."

"I don't care."

"What happened to waking you up from your slumber?"

She just stared at me, her face devoid of any emotion whatsoever.

"You don't care," I spoke for her, sighing. "Right, okay… I got it."

"I know Irene is irresistible to young hormone-ridden youths like you," Ria said, her tone like some disapproving mother's lecture. "But that's not an excuse for not thinking! What, did you think she's gonna fall in love with you if you do this? Is that why you agreed to the pact? Get real! That'll never happen!"

Okay, I'm a little bit scared to shatter her presumption. See, I'm not entirely ready yet to end up as a bundle of charcoal on the ground midway through breaking the news as to how it really went down. 

"I can't believe you made her go and do that! I'm actually outraged, she's like a daughter to me, I watched her grow! Adorable baby girl to sexy bombshell! That beautiful, reserved, cool, aloof woman is a no-go - no touch! I thought you might have known that already! Besides, you got the Elf! You want the Elf! Why you trying to lay your naughty hands all over my dear Irene for?"

"Alright um…" I paused, picking the perfect words out. "Say, hypothetically, if she was the one who forced me into it, and still hypothetically, she was in love with me along and - "

Ria burst out laughing. And it wasn't the short demeaning chuckle at my expense type of laughter either. This was the hail mary of laughs… persisting on and on without end until eventually there were just silent wheezes - with her desperately gasping for air in between.

I tried interjecting, somehow say a bit more through her hysterics "Let's say, she also tried to make a move on me… get me into bed, and - "

No go. Roaring with laughter so hard, she was lighting up like a Christmas tree.

By the time she was finished, I was already a good twenty feet away from her. Heard from professionals it's wise to hang back from a volcano when it's near eruption.

"What are you doing all the way there?" She called out to me, wiping the tears from her eyes. 

"Saving myself," I told her flatly. "Because that's what happened."

Ria was still smiling. "What happened?"

"That."

"What's that?"

It was so easy to call her a birdbrain, but she just wasn't - I know she wasn't. Ria's smart. If she wasn't, that smile would have stayed, it wouldn't have slowly faded away - her jaw wouldn't have dropped, her eyes wouldn't have widened. 

And most of all, she wouldn't have started glowing brighter than my future prospects in my life. 

"She - WHAT?!"

Right now, those future prospects were shriveling up… burnt away in flames. Her flames.

Ever seen a phoenix chasing after a human before? Well, picture an oversized, human-sized burning goose… and then next to it, picture the human with his arms up bracing for impact in three… two… one…

Yeah, it was kinda like that.

I think I'm dead.

That average just keeps getting higher, doesn't it?

"Ria, let me explain, I'll explain… ria, RIA - RIA, I'll EXPLAIN!" 

My poor shirt, my poor eyes - why the fuck is fire so fucking bright?! 

"Yes, indeed you will! Oh, you will!" She yelled, shaking me senseless by the collar. "I know my Irene! Love's a myth! There's no such thing! That's her! That's her motto! What happened?! You tell me what happened!"

I have a feeling memory-diving is gonna be put on hold for a bit. Just until I manage to extinguish this wildfire spreading like mad over here. 

However long that'll take. 

So much for levity...

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