Imperfect Desires

121 Caught My Attention

*Flashback Continued*

Dylan's expression was like someone who had eaten a fly. He just couldn't believe his ears at all. "You're joking with me right?" He tried to laugh it off but Darren's face told him that he wasn't in the mood to play jokes at all. "Fuck it! You are my best friend and you don't know MY GODDESS!"

Darren was taken aback by Dylan's sudden change. Dylan stood up and placed the remote control of the tv in Darren's hand as he said, "Turn on any channel. Any channel that has nothing to do with business and sports."

Darren looked at the remote control in his hand with a weird look and couldn't help but say, "Didi, you always end up fighting with me over the remote control. Why are you offering it to me so easily today?"

"To make my point," said Dylan and urged him to change the channel.

Darren didn't know what he was playing at but he still complied and turned to a music channel. Coincidentally, the music video playing on the screen was the one Xiu featured in recently. "Oh, she's there."

"Of course, she is," said Dylan in a matter-of-factly tone and added, "Turn to another channel."

Darren changed the channel again and again and couldn't help but sigh out, "She's everywhere." It was amazing for him to know that on almost every channel, either it was a commercial, talk show, variety show, drama or news, her face was everywhere.

"I can understand that you live out of the country so you might not know her very well. But don't act so oblivious. My Goddess Xiu rules the entertainment circle. She is the person with the most endorsements in her circle. She's a spokesperson for international brands. For the past three years, she bags all the awards she's nominated for. It's a very common belief that once Chen Xiu is nominated in any category, the rest should lose hope of winning." Dylan was babbling on and on about Xiu like a real fan.

The sparkle of admiration and worship in his eyes was startling and stunning. Darren had never seen his best friend acting like this before. It was as if someone gave him a chance, Dylan could talk about Xiu for days without stopping. When Darren realized how happy Dylan was while talking about Xiu, a ridiculous thought popped up in his mind.

"Didi, have you fallen in love with her?"

Dylan stopped talking abruptly and smiled at his best friend. He sat down beside Darren and said, "Look at the screen, Daz." Darren did as he said. The scene on the screen was of one where Xiu was dressed in a completely white dress. There was a smile on her face so ethereal that one couldn't possibly look away. "That smile is enough to light up the whole world. Do you know why?" Darren knew it wasn't a question he could answer. So, he waited for Dylan's reply. "Because she hides the darkness of the world behind her smile just to light this world up for others."

Darren's heart shook for a moment as he heard Dylan talking like this. "Bro, she's my Goddess Xiu. Falling in love with her? A mere human like me is not good enough for her. She is like a real Goddess to me, one that people can only look at but can never touch. She's someone people can worship but can never become. She's that fantasy of mine where I believe no one is good enough for her. I'm so scared to even handshake with her at her fan meetings just because I believe that I might taint her."

The way Dylan had placed her up on a pedestal made Darren recall the way he saw Xiu. She wasn't a Goddess. She was just like any other girl. He remembered the way she laughed when he said he didn't know her. She looked free at that moment as if someone finally tore away her shackles. "She lost her individuality, trying to keep up the pretense," he muttered to himself as he felt a little ache for her.

"But I know it's getting harder for her," Darren looked at Dylan to elaborate. "The first time I saw her on the screen, she had become my idol. But now my Goddess is struggling. Not with the world since she is already at the top of the world. Now, she's struggling with herself. It's as if she's slowly losing herself. The time she had spent trying to become the Nation's Goddess has snatched something from her."

"What?" asked Darren as he suddenly was intrigued to know.

"She lost happiness and her own identity. Her every action and word is under the scrutiny of millions of people. And we are living in hypocrites. We don't want to be perfect ourselves but we want our idols to stay as the epitome of perfection. I don't know why we forget that they also have feelings. They are as much human as we are. Even some are really sensitive. But as long as the criticism is not about us, who gives a damn about feelings?"

Darren smiled as he ruffled Dylan's hair and said, "I didn't know our Didi was so serious about something. This Goddess of yours sure has some supernatural power. How else could she get our Didi to speak like an adult?"

Dylan stood up and said, "You're right. She does have supernatural power. But her power is only that she catches the attention of people too fast. She has a way of capturing people's interest." He turned on his heels to leave but stopped to say, "Do you know I see her smile every day. But it's been a long time since I've seen her happy."

Darren couldn't say anything about the other things but he was certain about her supernatural ability. She could intrigue people without trying. She was well worthy of someone called Superstar. "Ah, except for her foul mouth," he said to himself and looking at the screen of the tv, he added, "Congratulations, Ms. Superstar! You caught my attention real fast."

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