I’m Really a Superstar

In the jungle.

An hour.

Two hours.

Zhang Ye had already been hiking for three hours. His pants had been torn by the bushes, and his face was covered with dirt. There was no food or water, and his lips were so dry that they were cracked. His energy level was rapidly decreasing. This was not a state he could achieve through makeup but an absolute effect from the reality of survival in the wild.

The camera was recording.

Zhang Ye said tiredly, “When you lose your way in the wild, the first thing you need to do is to locate a river. That means you’ll have a source of water and even food. I’ve been walking for several hours, but I still don’t know how far I am from a water source. I might have to continue walking for another day? Or two days? I don’t know. All I know is that I’m hungry, very hungry. My energy levels have depleted rapidly and I can’t take it anymore. I need to find some food to replenish my strength. Otherwise, I might really end up unable to get out of this jungle.” His breathing then became much heavier.

Awhile later.

He squatted down around a patch of grass.

The film crew also stopped.

Then they saw Zhang Ye pull out a plant from the ground. It looked just like a bunch of grass, and there was nothing special about it. “It looks like I have no other choice left. Although not many people would eat it, I am convinced that this is edible.”

Sun Kuang widened his eyes.

Tong Fu’s jaw dropped.

Everyone looked at him dumbfoundedly.

They watched Zhang Ye look a little unsure before stuffing the wild vegetation into his mouth. He chewed on it and began to frown. “It doesn’t taste bad, but it tastes a little like grass.”

Nonsense!

That is fucking grass!

You really dare to eat anything, don’t you!

Sun Kuang said anxiously, “That had better not be poisonous!”

Zhang Ye smiled. “Don’t worry, it isn’t.”

Everyone continued on their way forward.

The wild vegetation was clearly not enough to fill Zhang Ye’s stomach. His physical fitness was much better than everyone else’s, and he had good stamina too. But because of that, his energy consumption was also much greater than most people. At this moment, Zhang Ye’s stomach was rumbling with hunger. Along the way, his eyes glinted whenever he saw anything that looked edible.

As he walked.

He kept eating.

Strange wild vegetation.

Strange shrubs.

And even strange tree bark.

Zhang Ye tried all of them at least once.

“This one’s not bad.”

“This tastes a little strange.”

Everyone looked at him speechlessly.

Suddenly, Zhang Ye looked up a tree. “Wait! There’s a bird’s nest! From this angle, I can’t really see what species of bird it is. But it shouldn’t be a bird of prey. I also don’t know if there are any bird’s eggs in it.” He stood underneath the tree and observed for a long time. “It’s at a height of around 15 meters, and the tree trunk looks a little thin. I do not suggest climbing this sort of tree because it will be very difficult to support my entire weight. However, I’m feeling too hungry right now. I need to give it a try.”

The film crew said anxiously:

“Aiyo!”

“Please be careful!”

“You can’t possibly climb that, right?”

Everyone looked skeptical.

But in the next moment, Zhang Ye climbed right up the tree. With a grab and hooking his legs around the tree trunk, he began climbing while saying, “This kind of tree has a very thin trunk, so one has to pay close attention to their balance. It has to be done very slowly to keep movement to a minimal extent. Aiyo, that was a little dangerous. The trunk is starting to sway a little. Let it steady first, there’s no hurry.”

Five meters.

Ten meters.

He finally climbed up the tree.

Zhang Ye laughed. “Haha, how fortunate. I spotted two eggs, but they’re not big. It’s about the same size as a quail’s egg, but it should be enough for me to replenish my protein intake.” Saying that, he reached out to grab the eggs and held them lightly in one hand. Then he prepared to descend. But when he slid down a few meters, due to his one-handed manipulation, he lost his balance, and the tree titled to one side!

Sun Kuang exclaimed, “Careful!”

Tong Fu paled. “He’s falling down!”

Wu Yi said, “Damn!

Zhang Ye fell off the tree with a loud thud. The moment hit the ground, he landed on his feet and rolled on the ground to relieve the impact. However, he still let out a loud, pained cry in the end. He picked himself up with some difficulty and opened his hand to have a look. “Luckily for me, the eggs are fine.”

Everyone ran up to him.

“How are you?”

“Did you get hurt?”

Zhang Ye stood up with a smile. “I’m fine.”

Everyone heaved a sigh of relief.

Zhang Ye said into the camera, “I still haven’t found a water source yet, so I don’t think I’ll have a chance to cook the eggs. There’s only one way left.” The next second, under the shocked gaze of the film crew, he tilted his back head and opened his mouth wide. Then he crushed one of the eggshells with one hand and swallowed the egg in it. “Oh, there’s quite a stench, but it still tastes quite good. Maybe it’s because I’m too hungry. Not bad, another one.” He also downed the second egg.

Wu Yi said, “You ate that for real?”

Tong Fu was a little disgusted. “Can that be eaten raw?”

Zhang Ye smiled and said, “All eggs can be eaten raw.”

Sun Kuang was impressed. “You’re good!”

Zhang Ye said, “Come on, let’s go and see what’s up ahead.”

They walked for another hour.

The film crew was exhausted, so they set up camp.

Zhang Ye brought Sun Kuang along to explore the surroundings.

Suddenly, Zhang Ye shouted, “Old Sun! Don’t move!”

Sun Kuang blinked in confusion. “What’s wrong?”

When the film crew came over after hearing the commotion, they were all quite shocked!

At this time, Sun Kuang noticed a snake at his feet. His face turned green. “Fuck!”

Seeing that he was about to run off, Zhang Ye shouted again, “Don’t move!”

Sun Kuang said in panic, “What kind of fucking snake is this?”

“A rattlesnake.” Zhang Ye said, “It’s highly venomous.”

A venomous snake?

And it was even a rattlesnake?

Everyone was feeling really scared!

But Zhang Ye was very calm. In fact, he even looked excited. “This is a snake’s nest. I can already see three snakes, and there should still be more hiding within the grass. Old Sun, don’t move. I’ll take care of it for you.” Lowering his head to look around, he slowly crouched down and picked up a tree branch that was on the ground. He walked up and quickly caught the rattlesnake with it. The tip of the tree branch was Y-shaped and it pressed the rattlesnake down in place.

Sun Kuang quickly ran away!

Tong Fu said, “Run, Director Zhang!”

Wu Yi said, “Hurry up and get back over here. Teacher Sun is fine now!”

However, Zhang Ye did not move. Instead, he bent over and picked up the rattlesnake by its tail. Bang, bang, bang. He killed it by smashing it several times against the ground. Then, he heard the familiar sound of rattling coming from within the grass. When around five or six rattlesnakes suddenly rushed towards him, Zhang Ye finally turned around and made a run for it!

“Let’s go!”

“Ah!”

“Run!”

When they returned to the campsite.

Everyone was sweating. It was too dangerous, so dangerous that they might just have lost their lives. Everyone was chattering among themselves to comfort each other. Suddenly, they remembered Zhang Ye and looked around to find him. Eh? Director Zhang? When they finally spotted Zhang Ye, everyone felt like vomiting blood!

This guy was trying to make fire by drilling wood together!

He actually wanted to eat snake meat!

Sun Kuang broke down. “Y-You still want to eat that?”

Tong Fu exclaimed, “That’s a poisonous snake!”

Wu Yi said, “I’m fainting!”

This glutton!

He didn’t care about his life at all when there was something to eat!

Zhang Ye spent more than half an hour before he finally got the fire started. Then he began handling and preparing the snake. He cut off its head and dug out its internal organs before placing it over the fire to roast it. His actions were all fluid and experienced. When the snake meat was done roasting, the aroma spread in all directions. Even the film crew had their appetites whetted.

Zhang Ye tore off a piece of snake meat and sniffed. Then he ate it. “Whoo, it smells so good. This is really the most delicious thing I’ve eaten today. Compared to the grass and eggs I had, this is what real food should be like.”

Sun Kuang rolled his eyes.

Go on and eat!

You’d die from it sooner or later!

Man vs. Wild?

This is obviously closer to Man v. Food!

At this moment, a member of the film crew discovered a pawprint and immediately called out to everyone in a fluster, “Director Zhang, everyone, come and see this. What kind of pawprint is it?”

“It’s so big?”

“What animal does it belong to?”

“I don’t know.”

They couldn’t identify it.

When Sun Kuang saw it, his face immediately changed.

Zhang Ye narrowed his eyes and looked down. He reached out to feel the pawprint, “It’s a bear! This mark should have been left here less than two hours ago.”

The film crew was dumbfounded!

A bear?

There are bears here?

And it was just here awhile ago?

Sun Kuang said nervously, “We can’t stay in this spot!”

Tong Fu said, “Hurry, let’s go!”

On this mountain range, the bears were near the top of the food chain!

However, Zhang Ye’s next words scared them out of their wits!

Zhang Ye muttered to himself, “Aren’t bear paws quite tasty?”

Sun Kuang pulled him back. “Damn! You’re still thinking about eating bear paws?”

“Director Zhang, calm down!” Tong Fu called out.

Wu Yi hurriedly grabbed onto him. “You mustn’t eat that!”

Little Liu said, “What are you trying to do!”

Zhang Ye laughed dryly, “Haha, I was just joking.”

You glutton!

You really don’t fucking care about your life!

Everyone nearly broke down. On the way here, Zhang Ye seemed to have fucking eaten everything that he came across, like grass, tree bark, bird eggs, and snake meat. Although Zhang Ye said that he was only joking, no one knew whether that was true. This guy’s brain circuits had always been wired differently from that of a normal person’s, so they were afraid that Zhang Ye would start hungering for bear meat so much that he would send them to their deaths together with him. This was the wilderness, an area uninhabited by people. If they really encountered a bear here, they didn’t know if Director Zhang would really end up having bear meat or not. But one thing they knew was that the bunch of them would definitely get eaten by the bear first!