Chapter 417 – Uninvited Gues
I was determined to make Xiao Qin apologize to Niu ShiLi. She couldn’t make me change my mind, so she could only say:
“I can’t apologize to him in person no matter what, how about I compensate him...”
“How would you compensate him? You sent him to the hospital for over half a month, do you think a meal is enough to compensate?”
“I... could find a girlfriend for him.”
“Who are you thinking of?”
“How about Xiao Huang....”
“Xiao Huang, as in Yellow Rose? The one who has body like a balloon and the face of a man. If she’s going to be his girlfriend, I think he would have preferred you to have beat him to death.”
“Is she not a good choice?” Xiao Qin thought a bit more, “Then, I could only find someone else... there’s about a thousand girls at Thousand Crane, so I’m bound to find someone suitable...”
“Hey, why would you think the girl you choose would even like Niu ShiLi?”
“Um, I think they would do it out of respect for me....”
“Is this even a matter of respect?”
“I was once the boss of Thousand Crane. Even though Xiao Hong (Red Rose), Xiao Huang (Yellow Rose), and Xiao Hei (Black Rose) succeeded me, I still have some influence among the students. If the girl I choose isn’t willing to date Niu ShiLi, then perhaps...”
“Then perhaps the Rose Group would deal with her? I was wrong about you, I can’t believe you would force a girl to date someone.”
Xiao Qin pulled at the hair on the side of her head, “I don’t want to, but I only made the plan because you’re forcing me to apologize to Niu ShiLi. If they don’t want to be pressured to do something, then all they have to do it train themselves. If they had someone they loved deeply like me, then no one would be able to force them to do anything.”
Nonsense, do you think everyone is a prodigy at martial arts like you? Someone like Gong CaiCai wouldn’t even be able to injure one of your fingers even after training for a hundred years. If she was threatened, then she might actually date someone she doesn’t like.
I then realized we haven’t taken a major premise into consideration: does Niu ShiLi even want a girlfriend?
Loud Mouth says Niu ShiLi likes the class leader, but a conservative estimate would be that over half the boys in class 2-3 likes the class leader (a lot of them also likes Gong CaiCai at the same time). If Gong CaiCai is a cute white bunny, then the class leader would be unreachable like a black falcon soaring through the sky. She has her sights set on her goal and would only occasionally take a breather at the peak of a mountain. You might be able to reach the peak after great hardships, but by then she has already flown to a higher place out of your reach. So you could only long for her without ever being able to obtain her.
That’s why it’s possible Niu ShiLi even likes aliens more than he likes the class leader. It’s kind of like how I like Optimus Prime more than Xiao Qin right now.
So I decided to first probe Niu ShiLi’s thoughts.
As we were doing radio calisthenics outside, I stood behind Niu ShiLi and asked:
“Niu ShiLi, can I ask you a question?”
“What?” Niu ShiLi was vigilant against me.
“Um... uh...” We weren’t on good terms, so I couldn’t really think of a good way to ask if he wanted a girlfriend.
Thus I tried to ask tactfully: “Niu ShiLi, do you sometimes feel lonely?”
I regretted my choice of words right away.
Niu ShiLi’s eyes widened to the point it was about to burst. He had both shock and fear present on his face as he subconsciously clenched his buttocks.
“I’m warning you. I’m not gay, go find someone else.”
I dawdled a bit after radio calisthenics before returning to class. When I returned, I saw Xiong YaoYue sitting at my seat preoccupied with something.
I walked over and patted her shoulder, “Hey, what are you up to now?”
“I’m using your spot to dry my books. It’s your fault I spat my juice all over my textbook, you had to say something like ‘loving the Japanese’. Since your seat is close to the windows, I’m drying my textbook on the window sill. Make sure you watch it closely, I’ll blame you if it goes missing.”
Xiong YaoYue spoke to me as if I was one of her close female friends. She looked at her ruined textbook and spoke in an annoyed tone:
“How unfortunate, even if it dries, it will still be wrinkled. The pages will be wavy and curvy like ramen.”
Xiong YaoYue always talks in a loud voice and she attracted the class leader.
“Xiao Xiong....” the class leader said before Xiong YaoYue immediately interrupted: “Xiao Ban Ban, what’s up.”
The class leader blushed, “I already said I don’t like that name.”
“Then don’t call me Xiao Xiong. Now I want to be called Winnie. It sounds more cool and elegant...”
The class leader frowned: “I can’t adjust that quickly.”
Xiong YaoYue slumped down on my desk like a sloth and grabbed onto the class leaders hands:
“It shouldn’t be hard for you to call me Winnie. If you call me Winnie, I’ll have more energy during class and I’ll be able to get at least 60s on tests. It’s worth it.”
“Is that so. Then how long will you use this nickname?”
“Of course for a long time, definitely longer than Xiao Xiong since Winnie finally doesn’t have a bear in the name.”
Who said that? Winnie the Pooh is a bear!
The class leader squinted, “If I call you Winnie, can you promise... you won’t call me Xiao Ban Ban anymore?”
“I promise. If I break my promise, then I won’t ever be able to get married.”
“Okay that’s fine.” The class leader cleared her throat, “Then I’ll call you Winnie from now on. I hope you will use this nickname for a long time.”
“Definitely.” Xiong YaoYue shouted happily having achieved her goal, then she asked the class leader: “What did you need me for again?”
“Oh, it’s nothing.” The class leader broke free from Xiong YaoYue’s clutches and returned to a more casual standing position with her hands on her hips, “If you’re worried about wrinkles on the textbook, you can leave the textbook in the freezer overnight and it should return to normal.” (TN: That’s actually a cool process I didn’t know)
“Really?” Xiong YaoYue was shocked like she just heard the White House was occupied by aliens, “Class leader, you know a lot of daily tips and tricks! If I was a man, I would think you’re a top candidate to be my wife!”
“It’s only common knowledge.” the class leader said, “And please don’t eat in class anymore. It’s not good for your studies or your stomach, and food remains may attract cockroaches.”
“Okay, okay, I know.” Xiong YaoYue’s voice was loud, but didn’t sound sincere.
The class leader then left to take care of Eunuch Cao who was harassing Gong CaiCai. Xiong YaoYue then turned to me and said:
“To be honest, even if I was a man, I wouldn’t marry Xiao Ban Ban.”
“Huh, didn’t you just promise you wouldn’t use that name? Are you not afraid of not being able to be married?”
“Hehe, the class leader doesn’t like change, so once she starts calling me Winnie, it’s hard for her to change back. That means my plan was a success and she will call me Winnie from now on, but I can call her Xiao Ban Ban at any time.”
Xiong YaoYue was pretty childish to be so self satisfied.
“Hey answer my earlier question. This isn’t the first time you made a promise on the fact you won’t be able to get married.”
“Actually I don’t really want to get married, so that’s why I wouldn’t marry the class leader even if I was a man.”
Well that’s based on the premise the class leader even wants to get married to you! And why don’t you want to get married?
Xiong YaoYue clasped her hands behind her head and leaned back on the chair to look up and stare at the slowly spinning ceiling fan.
“We don’t even have AC in our class. It’s so hot I don’t even want to wear my bra anymore.”
“You strayed off topic again, we weren’t talking about the temperature in the class.”
“Oh, I just feel like there’s always a huge difference between different people. If two people stay together all the time, then there’s bound to be friction. It can even turn good friends into enemies and that would be tragic. I think it’s better to be free and get together and leave each other at any time.”
So you’re in the faction of people who don’t want to get married? I thought you didn’t want to marry the class leader because you thought she was annoying.
In the afternoon study session, Xiong YaoYue was eating matcha ice cream while doing her homework.
The class leader saw, but it would melt if she confiscated it and that would be a waste. It was also pretty unbearable in a classroom without AC. I guessed the class leader also wanted to eat ice cream, but she had to endure it.
“Ahh.” A girl from the front row suddenly screamed.
“Ahyyyaa.” The girls around her also screamed in succession as if it was a relay race.
“Cockroach, there’s a cockroach!”
Gong CaiCai turned pale when she heard there was a cockroach and almost fainted.
A few boys in the front row tried to step on it with their feet. I’m not sure if they were dumb or if they all wanted dot keep hearing the girls scream, but they all missed it. Eventually the large reddish black cockroach made its way to the fourth row right between Loud Mouth and Little Smart.
“Move, let me do it.” Loud Mouth snatched a English dictionary from a boy in the front rows, she aimed at the cockroach that was moving in an S pattern and planned to crush it with the dictionary.
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