Abaddon couldn't say what was wrong with him.
He usually never lacked wonderful things to say about his wives.
From Lailah to Erica, he could write a full twenty page paper on what he loved about each of them.
But for some reason, he was continuously drawing blanks today!
"I'm so fucked..."
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and a familiar face poked his head inside without waiting for an answer.
Wearing a lavish outfit comprised of black pants with a blue and gold wesekh and a long black robe, he was almost the spitting image of his father.
"Best man reporting for duty."
Abaddon chuckled. "I'm not quite like your mothers, kid. You could have waited until later to get dressed for the ceremony."
The best man snapped his fingers and his clothes became a thick black hoodie that he often wore around the house and a pair of basic basketball shorts."Alright, well... surely there are some kind of best man duties I need to perform?"
Abaddon shrugged.
Apophis sighed before taking a seat beside his father and staring up into the ceiling.
"So I'm just supposed to hang around you for the day? That's not very exciting."
"I assure you, you're the only one in existence that thinks so."
"That's just because you're my old man, not my wildest fantasy given flesh."
"...I'm not old."
"You are literally the third being ever crea-"
"That body was destroyed, this one is only nineteen!"
"Sure, sure. But aren't you ashamed to be a nineteen year old with eight kids? And your birthday is next month, the hell are we supposed to celebrate? The fact that you are infinity and 20?"
Abaddon thought about it for a couple of moments.
Combining his time on earth with his time as Exedra, he would say that he was exactly forty years old.
Or at least he would be in a month from now.
"...We'll say I'm thirty nine, and keep it pushing."
"The hell? That's-"
"Oh, I'm sorry. Is that not realistic enough for you, you fucking one year old?"
"...You don't look a day over twenty eight, pops."
"That's what I thought."
The two of them fell into silence for a moment before inevitably bursting into laughter.
Abaddon has a special relationship with all of his children that is unique to them.
He makes an effort to spend time with all of them, but if one asked who was the child he spent the most time with, then it would probably be Apophis.
Somehow, the first son has a special gift for seeing his father's blind spots and pointing them out in a manner that only makes him feel stupid around half the time.
They often have many late night chats together over glasses of liquor, at which point they talk about life, love, culture, and visions for the future.
Apophis finally noticed the blank sheet of paper in his father's lap and he shook his head in disappointment.
"What is that, dad..?"
Abaddon placed his face in his palm out of embarrassment. "...My vows.""Cool... you writing in invisible ink?"
Apophis held out his finger and a small beam of blacklight shone out from his claw.
"Ah, no. You're just moronic then."
"Horribly so."
Apophis shook his head in disappointment.
His father, the mighty origin of dragons and the supernatural was also inept at writing his own wedding vows.
Who would have thought?
"What is it? Writer's block?" he asked.
"I wish. It's more like I have so much to say that I've been locked in a stalemate against my own mind. Nothing feels good enough."
Apophis sighed as he pulled the draw strings tighter on his hoodie and reclined back onto the leather couch.
"Dad… you don't need to give moms some out of this world essay about how much you love them and all that you are willing to do for them."
"But do they not deserve that?"
"Of course they do, but if you keep focusing on giving them everything you feel like they deserve, then you will get stuck like this.
What would they want to hear from you? What parts of your marriage do you value the most? I think that will be more than enough."
Nodding slowly, Abaddon gave his blank paper another once over with a new light in his eye.
Picking up his pen once again, he finally started writing with a much more clear and focused line of thought than what he had before.
Apophis just sat quietly as he rested his eyes; allowing his father to enjoy this intimate moment without his added babbling.
Minutes ticked by before Abaddon finally finished writing his vows and held them out proudly.
He wasn't one to brag, but he considered this to be quite the thoughtful body of work.
"Done then?"
"I am indeed." Abaddon passed the written vows to his son to read.
Apophis smiled imperceptibly as he read every single line.
He could feel the emotion written into every word, and a true appreciation for the wives' individual qirks and characteristics.
"…Simp." He said with a smile.
A vein bulged in Abaddon's head as he showed a smile that was not a smile.
Before he was struck over the head, Apophis held up his hands in surrender.
"Joking, joking!"
"It is too late. If you ever get married again I will be sure to enact my revenge properly."
"Ha! I'd like to see that, since Thea and I have already told you that we aren't."
Abaddon nodded thoughtfully as he snatched back his vows.
"I also said that once upon a time. But then I met the women who broke down my barriers, forced their way into my heart and became integral pieces to the dynamics of your mothers. And now… I have everything I ever could have wanted."
Apophis thought about it for a moment before waving his hand dismissively.
"Yea, yea, I'll keep that in mind. Anyway, is that all you have on your to do list? What else are we supposed to do until the wedding starts?"
Abaddon rubbed his chin as he thought about it carefully and it wasn't long before he came to an irrefutable conclusion.
"Kill some time."
- 1 Hour Later
Currently, Abaddon, Belloc, and now Straga were sitting in the dark and watching a famous boxing movie from earth.
The two adults were watching with glasses of liquor in their hands, while baby Straga was making do with a popcorn bucket and a juice box.
"I'm calling BS. There's no way a human gets hit like that and gets up after." Apophis gripped.
"This choreography isn't bad.. I see such minute errors in their form that I could swear they were professionals." Abaddon noted.
"Can Straga learn to box?"
Both men looked at the young toddler sitting in between them.
In an instant, they had a vision of a fully grown Straga with a monstrous physique, who used no weaponry and instead handed out haymakers left and right that could level mountains.
…It was awesome!
"We will teach you everything in time, but I suppose we can start with boxing first."Abaddon said thoughtfully.
"And I will be the one to teach you, little brother! You're gonna learn from the best sibling you have!" Apophis confirmed.
But of course, Abaddon had to comment on this.
"Oh? Didn't realize you'd beaten Thea since our last chat."
"…You're such an unlikeable old man that it isn't even funny."
"Hahahaha!"
In the middle of their necessary bonding experience, there was suddenly a flurry of knocks at the door before a woman poked her head inside.
Oshun looked positively exhausted, and it was clear that she was practically running on fumes by this point.
When she saw that neither Abaddon, nor his best man were dressed, she all but fainted.
"Why… why do all of you insist on making my job as difficult as possible?! Why aren't you ready yet?"
Abaddon snapped his fingers while both of his sons did the same.
Straga and Apophis reappeared in their fancy wedding garments alongside their father.
However, Abaddon was by far the most captivating of the three.
She had been told that the dragon king wasn't a fan of dressing up, and now that she was seeing him she couldn't help but feel like that was a total pity.
But she would ingrain this sight into her brain for as long as she lived.
The dragon king wore a simple pair of white pants and dress shirt paired with simple wingtip shoes.
A bright red robe made of silk and the same color as his hair was draped over his shoulders like a cape, giving him a regal and majestic aura.
His hair was bound in a strong ponytail that left two strands of hair free to frame his face perfectly like a picture in a frame.
Golden earrings like dragon's wings hung from his lobes; with the initials of all ten women written on each.
A little gift he had received from them the night before.
The belt he wore was one made of dyed red leather, with the buckle being the insignia of two, coiling dragons, each of them with multiple heads and pairs of wings.
He stood up from his seat and walked over to Oshun with his hands outstretched.
"Well? Good enough?"
Oshun was a happily married woman.
But in that moment, she completely forgot about her marriage to the god Shango.
"I can't tell if I prefer you with or without a shirt… if you were trying to steal me from my husband, you are really over halfway there, you know?"
Against all expectations, Abaddon smiled at her and brought his face ever closer to hers.
She got a strong whiff of his natural cologne-like scent mixed with the warm impact of alcohol; nearly making her dizzy and awakening certain desires.
"Creolnali batobot shilta qe ahfvena ui ti xihuuli tepohair…"
Hearing an ancient language rattling around in her brain in Abaddon's extremely seductive voice caused Oshun's entire body to vibrate with visceral excitement.
It didn't matter that she didn't understand what he had just said, it was the most erotic thing that she had ever been through in her life.
She fell down to her knees and Abaddon walked right past her without a second thought while she recouperated.
Apophis' snickering caught her attention, and she questioned him while she tried to catch her breath.
"I-I don't speak dragon yet… what did he say? Is he going to call me to their bed tonight??"
'Mommies and daddy have sleepovers?' Straga wondered.
Apophis hoisted up his little brother and let him sit atop his shoulders before he followed behind their father.
"Don't you know already that he doesn't have any concubines? He said; 'something that can be taken isn't worth having.' I'm inclined to agree."
It took a moment for Oshun to wrap her head around everything that Apophis had just said, and when he was gone a dark blush showed up on her face as she scowled.
"H-Hateful man! I was just joking..!"
Oshun got to her feet and grimaced at the wet sensation that had formed within her panties.
After changing them, she followed behind the three dragons with a permanent scowl, and a firm promise to herself to never plan a dragon wedding again.
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