Data-Driven Daoist

A metallic scrape cut through the silence as the reeds shifted under the crab’s many feet. It loomed, massive, rusted orange as if painted with mud and orange peels. Razor-sharp pincers clicked.

Huang Niuniu grabbed Yu Han’s Coveralls and dragged him backward.

“It’s going to eat us!” she screamed.

“Calm, Sister,” Wen Liujie said.

The creature came ashore, each leg shifting in eerie unison. Jagged spikes jutted from its back, long vines of weed and moss hanging from them like ornaments. Its two enormous front claws were asymmetrical and bristly, while its eight walking legs were long and pointed.

Its obsidian eyes remained empty of emotions, except for a hint of orange from those narrow, flame-like vertical pupils fixed on its onlookers. Each of the eye-stalks resembled a club topped with a long, pointy horn. One of stalks rotated left, the other leaned forward.

“The Non-Thinker Crab.” Wen Liujie stepped forward. He bowed, and the giant orange crab inclined its head in return.

It shook its bigger claw. A piece of leather parchment fell out, and Yu Han saw strange scribbles on it.

“I don’t know what it says,” Wen Liujie said.

The crab picked up the parchment with its pincers and went back into the lagoon, perching back into a shallow burrow. Its many spikes and two eye-stalks seemed to blend into its carapace, creating the illusion that it was just a boulder.

“So that’s the crab that can’t think,” Yu Han muttered. They got back on the cart. Soon, the crab was just a blur in the distance.

“Did you hear about it in the Heavenly Friendship Palace?” Wen Liujie asked.

“I don’t know what that is,” Yu Han said. “It’s in the book I mentioned before, The Four Meditations on the Hundred Thousand Waterways. The author apparently befriended a crab that couldn’t think in a place called the Wisping Serpent Isthmus.”

“It was here long before I came to the Sect,” Wen Liujie said. “About seven decades—that’s what the Seniors say. Many people have contracted it, only to find out that it couldn’t think. It sits just there with that parchment, asking disciples if they know what it says. Don’t be like it, okay? Give proper effort to the job, and you’ll receive many resources in return.”

“It didn’t look like Common Script. Was it Imperial or Earthly?” Yu Han asked.

“It wasn’t Imperial,” Huang Niuniu said. She wiped her forehead with a small towel. Her legs shook, knees clicking together with every rumble of the cart.

“It’s neither. It’s a paper from—” Wen Liujie hesitated. “Probably a Ruin Trinket.”

“Ruin Trinket?”

“It’s better not to think about it.”

“You’re talking about the Sect’s Hidden Realm, aren’t you?” Yu Han said. It was a mysterious place mentioned in quite a few of the books. Not only in Ji’s Cultivation Contemplations, but also in The Four Meditations and the Rookie Cheat Sheet. РἈƝO͍ʙƐs

A place where monsters spawned endlessly, as did the remains of past empires and kingdoms. It was a land of unlimited riches and treasures, opportunities and dangers.

Many of the Sect’s External Missions related to it. In Blue Strategies Part 3, it mentioned that one of the most common reasons for disciples to create their own Courtyard—a non-permanent sub-Sect organization not under the purview of any Hall—was to form teams to venture into the Hidden Realm.

“Shi Miao told me her master took her to the Hidden Realm,” Huang Niuniu said. “They hunted many monster cores to level her Trait.”

“Why does it matter if it’s a Ruin Trinket?” Yu Han asked Wen Liujie.

“You’re demoted.”

“To what?” Yu Han asked. “I’d rather just quit.”

“I’m promoting you again.” Wen Liujie sighed. “Get used to the Sect, Junior Brother. There are many things to do here, even for us Common Talents. It’s better not to think about things concerning the Hidden Realm. Yes, you can get richer there. But you’ll also find death and betrayal.”

The conversation was over, and Yu Han didn’t probe any more.

The information in the books was limited. Dong Chou gave him mostly practical books, other than The Four Meditations. They all gave Yu Han a basic idea of Sect life, such as Cultivation realms, herbs, creatures, Gu, and Sect factions. None went into detail, though.

Yu Han guessed it was around 3 a.m. when they got back to the Night Alchemist’s Yard. After changing out of their Coveralls—apparently, the Coveralls would mend themselves with Qi if placed in their compartment—Wen Liujie took them on a tour of the single building in the compound.

“Behold, as I show you the Night Alchemist’s greatest perk!” He opened a door.

“Here you wash your bodies. The Sect provides us with Qi-rich medicinal gels and essential oils,” Wen Liujie said. The door led to the back of the building. There was another changing room there, and another bamboo door that led outside the building.

“I told others not to use it today. A special service just for you two.” Wen Liujie grinned.

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A stone pool lay outside with steaming water, surrounded by a high wooded palisade and covered with a giant tent-like roof. The pool was partitioned by a bamboo fence—one side for men, the other for women.

“A hot spring!” Huang Niuniu jumped.

“Junior Sister is wise. A spiritual hot spring, no less. Every time after work, you can use it,” Wen Liujie said.

The monkey in the hot spring chirped.

“Don’t mind them. The Blizzard-Eyed Aquatic Monkeys like to come down. They follow the rules, males and females sticking to proper sides.”

“There’s going to be monkey hair in the hot springs,” Huang Niuniu pouted. She was then splashed with water.

“Kyaa!”

“They’re Spirit Beasts, Junior Sister. Even they have face.” Wen Liujie chuckled. “I’ll log your records for today. The oils and soap are in the changing room. You can take them home if you want, too. After you use the hot spring, meet me again. There are other goodies.” He puffed out his chest.

He’s really selling it. Yu Han smiled wryly. Was the turnover rate for this job really so high? Or was the recruitment rate just that low?

“Hot spring! Hot spring!” Huang Niuniu’s mood was through the roof. “Stepping on poop was worth it.”

“Oi.”

They went into separate changing rooms. Yu Han took off his Sect robes, placing them into a marked wooden compartment. He grabbed a hemp towel and dipped into the hot spring.

“Ahhhh.”

“Chirp!” a monkey said.

“You said it.”

Yu Han didn’t mind the three monkeys. They looked like Little Pillar, Duan Xiaolong’s Spirit Beast—far smaller, though.

From the other side, splashing sounds could be heard with Huang Niuniu’s humming.

“This is the life.”

Yu Han didn’t even have the energy to scrub. The heat caressed his very soul, the fog of the spring clearing away his stress. It started raining.

Drip. Drop.

Yu Han appeared in Deep Sleep.

Did I fall asleep? He sighed. It was time to test out the effects of adding those five points to the Memory substat.

Click.

“What the fu—” He jumped up.

There was a football-sized crab in his Echoing Dreamscape.

“The Non-Thinker Crab?” he yelled. The crab was an exact imitation of the giant one he’d seen near the isthmus. “How did you get here?”

The crab clicked its claws. It circled Yu Han.

Click, click. Its feet tapped the white floor. It gurgled, eyes dancing up and down. Unlike in real life, where it appeared like a slothful monolith, in the dream it was like a puppy. One moment it would be scuttling near Yu Han’s feet, and the next it would be thumping against the shell-like wall of the Echoing Dreamscape.

Other beings can enter my Echoing Dreamscape! Yu Han’s heartbeat sped up. He had thought this place was his secret sanctuary. But a crab got in!

The crab tore a hole in the Echoing Dreamscape wall. On the other side was a cavern filled with speleothems.

“What the fuck are you doing, you stupid—” Yu Han paled. He was horrified.

The crab gurgled. A bunch of milky white orbs materialized from thin air and fell to the ground. One rolled to Yu Han’s feet.

He picked it up. “Pearls?”

The crab tugged Yu Han’s pant sleeve. It took out a small piece of parchment, clicked its claws, then pointed at it. Then at Yu Han, then the parchment again.

There were densely packed characters there. They looked less like Chinese and more like Arabic or Sanskrit.

“I don’t know what it is,” Yu Han said. “You tore a hole through my wall!”

The crab’s body dropped, as if dejected. It waved a claw at Yu Han, then scuttled into the hole accompanied by the sounds of dripping water coming from the other side. A second later, the hole closed like it was never there. All that was left were a bunch of pearls.

“What the hell just happened…?”

Was it the effect of those five extra points? That couldn’t be it.

He woke up. One monkey was pulling his hair, the other two splashing warm water on his head.

“Stop that. I’m awake,” Yu Han pushed the mischievous creatures away.

He rushed out of the hot spring, then wiped himself with a dry towel and took out the Sect robes from the wooden compartment.

“They’re clean?” And crisp. As if washed, dried, then aired. It felt like he was wearing a warm hug.

But his mind was on the crab.

Huang Niuniu came out a few minutes after he did. She was steaming, her face flushed red. The sweet scent of flowers wafted from her hair.

“I fell asleep,” she said with a blush. “I’ve only been in a hot spring once.”

“The monkeys woke me up.”

“They’re nice.”

They met up with Wen Liujie in the small study besides the large discussion chamber. There were many bamboo-bound scrolls on the shelves.

“I remember the first time I was here. I almost drowned after falling asleep.” Wen Liujie took out a wooden chest. He inserted a silver key. With a loud click, the chest opened. He took out two glass vials, passing one to Yu Han and the other to Huang Niuniu.

“A Pure Qi Assimilating Elixir,” Wen Liujie said. “Normally, you would assimilate Pure Qi with your Cultivation art. That takes too long, though. With this potion, you can assimilate Pure Qi into Realm True Qi three to five times faster, but there will be waste.”

“Do we get this for free?” Yu Han asked. This was a huge gain.

“A vial a week. You can buy more for a ten percent discount, too. We’re part of the Alchemy Hall, technically, so we get much of their stuff.” Wen Liujie grinned. “It’s best to take it when you have more than ten Pure Qi. It will waste a few, but you can gain eight to nine True Qi in one night.”

“Thank you, Senior Brother Wen!” Huang Niuniu sounded a lot cheerier, especially after the hot spring. Her half-crying, half-resentful voice from shovelling waste was gone, like it had been an illusion.

“Thank the Sect, not me,” Wen Liujie said. “You should come around once or twice a week. With you two, the other Seniors can have some leeway too. You see that map there?” He pointed at a large map of the Outer Sect central area. In places, there were nails embedded with bamboo slips hanging.

Each nail was the location of a waste tank. Each bamboo slip had a name.

“There are bamboo slips with your name. You need to hang them at least a week prior to indicate the waste tank you want to clean up. It’s best to give each tank a few good days so that enough Filth Eating Ghouls can spawn.”

“How many disciples work here?” Yu Han asked.

“Why so many questions? Who sent you? Was it the butchery?” Wen Liujie barked.

“Never mind.”

“Just work at your pace.” Wen Liujie patted his shoulder.

“It looks like there are a few hundred waste tanks,” Huang Niuniu said.

“There’s only about five on the Nest of Storm-Like Heroes. Less than ten if you count the marketplace and a few of the nearby Halls too. As for the ones on the other mountains, leave that to your other Senior Brothers.”

They both nodded. It was what it was. They didn’t expect it to be relaxing work.

“And try to head over at night,” Wen Liujie added.

“Why?” Yu Han questioned. He had no plans of wasting Deep Sleep time.

“It should take a few days for your Lifeforce to fully recover, right? Other than that, the Ghouls prefer darkness. Also—never mind. Tell me if you want to exchange the cores.”

“We’ll hold on to them for now,” Huang Niuniu replied, giving Yu Han a meaningful look.

They selected two waste tanks on the Nest of Storm-Like Heroes for the next week.

“What’s that?” Yu Han pointed at a notice board beside the map. Articles were pinned to it like the quest board in an JRPG tavern.

“You can only ask about that when you get promoted twenty times.” Wen Liujie pushed them out of the room.

“I can find out on my own, you know,” Yu Han said, but was ignored.

They headed back. When Yu Han’s back hit the bed, dawn was already there. He had no trouble sleeping, even with the nap in the hot spring.

In his Echoing Dreamscape, the crab appeared again.

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