Chapter 201 – I Love You
I sighed as the sensation of him swelled within me. It felt so right, so perfect. Despite how much time had passed, this was everything that I remembered, everything that reminded me of how unmistakably we belonged to each other. Tightening my arms around him, I clutched onto him with my inner muscles. "Bai Ye …" I breathed. "Keep it slow … I want to feel you … for as long as I can."
He let out a soft chuckle. "My thoughts precisely," he said, and our lips met once more.
Instead of the earlier, passionate kiss, this one was slow and lingering just like his motion below. He folded his arms around me, caressing my back with the warmth of his palm while he pressed his chest into me, sealing the space between us. The heat of his skin burned against mine, and I sizzled at the overwhelming presence of him surrounding me, within and without.
My own hands traced down his spine at the same time. He was still a little skinnier than before, but his shoulder blades and ribs were no longer as prominent as weeks ago, so I let myself be content and think without guilt about how sensual he felt under my fingertips. The smoothness, the warmth, the intimacy of his flesh bare against mine as he made slow love to me …
"Husband …" I whispered into his mouth. "I've almost forgotten how satisfying it is to hold you like this."
He smiled, the corner of his lips curling against mine. "Then don't let go," he coaxed. "I'll do fine without clothes all day."
Naughtily, he gave me a deep plunge, and I moaned when the surprise sent a pulse of heat shooting through me. Then I chuckled at his jest. "Don't make me sound like a succubus. What if I drain—"
I hastily cut myself off, remembering that I had indeed almost drained his life like this with my spiritual power. The heat threatening to swallow me whole cooled a little as I recalled all those moments in the past months, when he asked me to hold him, to moan for him and let him remember my voice. When he told me that his heart would always stay with me no matter where we were …
My eyes stung a little. I had not understood anything back then to know how much meaning he had hidden behind those simple words. I had not understood at all how much closer I was bringing him towards death every time he brought me those mind-shattering ecstasies.
But he only laughed softly at my inauspicious thoughts. "My life is yours," he breathed. "Has been, and always will be. You can drain it however you like … but if you wish to keep it for more sustained benefits in the long term—" he drawled the last few words and delved again deep into me, eliciting another moan from my throat, "—then I'll be here for you, for as long as you want me."
Meeting my half disapproving and half distrusting glare, he resumed the gentle swaying rhythm and pushed himself up a little to look into my eyes. "I swear it, Qing-er." He brushed his fingers over my cheek, his voice turning solemn. "I will never leave you again, and I will never try to hide any more secrets from you. I love you … All I want is for us to live the rest of our lives like this, simple, safe, and happy."
The light in his eyes gleamed, and the overwhelming affection in his words melted my heart. I stared at him, and my vision grew blurry. "B-Bai Ye," I said, my voice a bit trembling. "You've never said you love me before … N-Not that I needed to hear it to know it … But I like how it sounds …"
And in a way, I was glad that he had waited till now to say it. My hand skimmed over his chest, stopping over that terrifying layer of scars over his heart. Had I not learned all the entanglements of our past and how much sacrifice he had made for me, I would've never known how heavy a weight these three words carried.
He smiled. Curling my fingers and holding them in his hand, he leaned down and gathered me back in his arms. "I love you," he said again with another kiss. "I love you," he repeated as he thrust deeper into me once more. "I love you …"
Tears suddenly threatened to pour out of my eyes, but I fought them, knowing that he wouldn't want to see his promise broken again. "Bai Ye …" I simply clutched him with a slight sob, squeezing him into me as I demanded his kisses.
He silenced then, and our tongues tangled in a slow dance the same way our bodies did. He still didn't pick up speed though. As if to prove his determination to follow my commands, he kept it as slow as he started, taking his time to slide almost all the way out of me before inching back in. But he didn't need to do any more than that to drown me in moans. The endless cherishment in his words, the tender love in his kiss, the raw emotion in the way he held me … Everything that he gave me melted me, burned me. Every thrust sent me close to the edge, only to drop me back right where I was the next moment.
"Bai Ye …" I whimpered as the relentless waves of sensation rose and fell within me. But I didn't want it to end. For once, I didn't want him to give it to me so soon, because I wanted to hold him a little longer, savor it a little more. "Bai Ye …" I whimpered again, fighting the surge of pleasure that threatened to consume me. "I love you … I don't want to … ever let go of you … Bai Ye …"
But that last thrust still came. A gush of heat filled me from within, and I let out a trembling moan as I dug my fingernails into his shoulders, crying my release. He collapsed on top of me, both of us gasping for air.
Though our arms were still wrapped tightly around each other, never letting go.
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